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Asking for feedback in my profile rude?

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WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
Asking for feedback in my profile rude?

I find it to be disrespectful when guests don't leave feedback. Especially when I have given a guest positive feedback and see him blogging about having a pleasant stay at my place but he doesn't seem to find the time to leave a short feedback on WS I find it very annoying. So I added to my profile:
"Please provide feedback after hosting me/being hosted by me. For guests being hosted by me from now on I will change a positive feedback to neutral if I haven't received feedback (any type, also negative)
after two months."
Do you think that's OK or is it rude? I have hardly gotten any hosting requests after I changed my profile and it's been quite a few months.

WS Üyesi @wsadmin@ kullanıcısının resmi
Inappropriate - don't use feedback as a hammer

Feedback is not to be used to punish people, it's to let the community know about your experience with someone.

I'm sure you can find less punitive ways to express your request for feedback.

*Every* member of Warmshowers should leave feedback for *every* in-person experience with another member, please.

But this isn't the way to accomplish that. I'd say that your approach is worse than their lack of feedback.

-Randy
Warmshowers.org Webmaster

WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
You do sound pretty

You do sound pretty ticked-off in your "from now on" statement. I would try to avoid people in that kind of mood.

If I were to host you, and we had an apparently good time, but I forgot to leave feedback for you, it would seem like a real betrayal if you took away the "positive" feedback. Feedback is nice. For new-comers, it's really important to have it, so others can begin to see if the person is pleasant or reliable or whatever. But, for an old hand, one more compliment or less -- what difference does it make? Yes, it's a bit discourteous; but, only a bit, in my view.

And, besides, not everybody is that keen to get feedback.

So, you might must add to your profile a special request stating that you really enjoy feedback, it helps you recall guests, gives closure on visits, whatever -- it will probably remind your favorite guests/hosts to sit down and do it.

WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
feed back

I agree feedback is important. It is one of the things that makes this website work.
I very much prefer my guest to provide feedback for their visits at my home.
I have always given feedback for them.
But I have come to realize that the ratio is about 2/3 do and the other 1/3 don't.
I have a guest book which each has signed and often left very thankful messages which is great. It is fun to re-read those notes years later and recall fun times I have had hosting.
I realize that on a long distance bike ride there will always be new things popping up
but I don't think it is asking too much for folks to help everyone by leaving feedback
for both guests and hosts.
Okay lunch time over off my soapbox and back to work

Unregistered anon_user kullanıcısının resmi
I have noticed the same also.

I have noticed the same also. Of the many cyclists I have hosted, I have only received 1 feedback. It is discouraging for the host, and doesn't help guests either. I have put into my profile that feedback is appreciated, but you can't force anyone to give it.

WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
What I would find extremely

What I would find extremely rude is opening my home to a guest, telling them that I do value feedback quite a lot, and even after taking good care of them, they were to show me their "appreciation" by not even leaving feedback at all.

So, no, I don´t think you´re being unreasonable, and much less, rude, but as someone else has told you, you´re perhaps making yourself look a bit too "bitchy" if you forewarn people in your profile. IMO, it´s up to you to communicate that in a civil, reasonable way to your guests, and IF the feedback does not come after you´re specifically asked for it, then your "neutral" feedback is more than granted, and I´d probably do the same (if not more).

IMO, WS should enforce everybody to leave feedback (positive or otherwise) to be allowed to keep making requests/allowed on the site. People who don´t even bother to write 2 lines to express their gratitude after spending one or more nights at your house ARE the RUDE ones, not those who are happy enough just by asking the most basic signs of appreciation.

WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
Judging what is rude

It seems to me that imposing such rules on the list would make it inhospitable and bureaucratic without adding anything to our interactions. I find it entirely likely that many (maybe most) of those non-responders are great people, people I would hate to banish from the list for their "sins."

You see, I can imagine many reasons why someone would not leave feedback. Say I"ve just spent a couple days with you, you've been gracious and generous, and I'm appreciative. Before I leave, I take a moment to shake your hand, tell you how much I appreciated the hosting, invite you to visit me in my home whenever you are in the area. Is that not enough for you?

Now, say I'm one of the very many touring cyclists who have only a grudging relationship with technology. There are lots of these. They'll use email, maybe the WSL app, even; but, they view with dismay the billions of people who seem to be everywhere looking at their little screens rather than each other. These people might very well not want to sit down to write things in a web form -- especially if they just spoke from their heart in person. Why would you even want to have that pale shadow of appreciation that a web form contains?

There are many other scenarios that can explain why a visitor leaves no comment on the WSL website. Perhaps he had a series of mechanical problems that took his attention and eclipsed his ordinary practices, and then he was in a new situation and you slipped his mind. I just found comments from a host of mine and was horrified that I never had posted anything myself. I was truly horrified, because it was a host I was especially fond of and have thought of many times since. Stuff happens.

I think it's always dangerous to think we know how other people feel or how they should be acting or what they're thinking. There are so many individual differences and cultural misunderstandings; so many accidents and unexpected turns; and endless failures of technology or communication. From my experience, the great probability is that that guest who never posted any further thanks has been telling other hosts what a great host you were.

And, I guess I find the idea of enforced gratitude weird and unpleasant. A note of required feedback to me is worth nothing. A heartfelt note that the guest wanted to leave makes me feel good. The lack of such a note just makes me wonder how they're doing, where they've got to.

WS Üyesi WS Üyesi kullanıcısının resmi
Rude is a subjective term, so

Rude is a subjective term, so I can't really answer the question. But your profile makes me extremely uncomfortable and I wouldn't send you a hosting request after reading it. That may explain the lack of requests of late.

We've hosted and been guests. Some leave feedback, some don't and it's all good. I'd rather see a genuine voluntary feedback than a forced one.

...Michelle

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Thank you very much for your

Thank you very much for your opinions. Somehow I got three requests this month. Maybe I rank higher in the search lists because I've logged in recently? I will think about how to change my profile to make it more hospitable.
Giving feedback not only shows gratitude, having feedback from a person also helps me to remember him or her better. And there seems to be a small minority like one guy I met who proudly told me that he cycled almost for free through all of Europe because he found a warmshowers host almost every night who also gave him food. But he only had received two or three feedbacks and given none, if I remember correctly. If someone travels like this it's (mostly) fine with me, but I want to know beforehand because I will make less effort to host such a person than someone who also hosts (yes, for some people it's not possible/some people live in places no one ever wants to stay) and who not always stays at hosts, but also in a tent once in a while.